Sunday, May 18, 2008


Hello all. Please don't want to kill me or make me go through some horrible "married to an addict" life. Yeah, I don't know what that was. My pathetic attempt at some sort of joke. Anyways, it has been more than two months since I have been on here. I know I suck.

Things are going well. Yet everytime I write that here, I feel as if something will come crashing down, or like I am being incredibly naive. It IS possible for things to get well again, isn't it? They aren't always going to be horrible?

There has been maybe two times at most in the past months where his eyes looked suspicious. But he acted normal. I don't know. He is staying strong in his probation and passing all of his drug tests.

I have found new friends at work and have found joy in doing my own thing. Now that the weather is nicer, I can go out and walk when he is not there. I am kept busy by moving things to our new apartment, and studying for an exam for a career change I am embarking on. I am kept busy with my own friends' problems so I no longer focus on my own.

And the best thing is, I have started to forgive. I really have. I may have said that before. But I have been better at letting go and I am even laughing a little now-a-days. It's not easy, but I try.

I will try, TRY!, to update more, but I admit that it will not be easy. This site has now been blocked at work, and I usually forget by the time I get home.

In the meantime, can anyone tell me what happened to Cuntface McBitchfuck??