Thursday, August 23, 2007

Not How I Planned It

I told my co-workers today. Yes, I told S and my boss and my manager. It was really nervewracking, and since I am an emotional crazy person, I feel pretty wiped out from all of it.

It turns out that my good friend Rae (the one in the last bunch of posts) told S. And S in turn told my boss. S took me out for coffee this morning to go over work things and in the meantime, as we were working, he asked if he could interrupt for a moment. And then he said "Are you going to tell me or not?" I looked at him for awhile and then said "I don't want to."

I acted like a fool afterwards and started to cry. He is a good friend to me and was nice about it but I felt like a moron.

I was actually really mad at Rae because while she did help a little by making it easier, I feel like it made me look like a coward for not telling them myself. We all know the reason I didn't. I didn't want to tell them over the phone while I was in Florida. I wanted to tell them in person, but she beat me to it.

She is texting me now, telling me that she didn't mean to but that S was being very pushy. It really doesn't matter. Everyone but my immediate manager knew. I wish they didn't partially - so I could have told them, but I am also a little glad they did know, like I said.

Either way, I wish they would have heard it first from me. S and I finished our coffee and talked about some other life things - it was all around a nice coffee time and he was understanding. I was and still am sad about leaving these people that I have grown to care about tremendously, but it is high time for this position. I have been waiting awhile, and am so excited for it. While I will miss these people a lot, it is time for me to move into a position that I will love - something I enjoy doing and something that I look forward to coming to every day. It is time to start my career.

So tomorrow I have my physical for my new job. Eeks! I hate blood withdrawals and stuff. I'll let you know how that goes.

This post is kind of all over the place so when I am feeling a little more up to it, I will post more details if anyone cares.

3 comments:

Mary P Jones (MPJ) said...

I hate when coworkers spill your business before you can. I had a coworker do that with my first pregnancy. I was waiting until after the first trimester to share, but she guessed I was pregnant and blabbed to everyone. Bleh!

joy said...

Yuck.

But you're moving on to bigger and better things, and that's good...!

Recovery Discovery (R) said...

Here's to emotionally crazy people in job transition. I, for one, do want to hear more when you want to share. I'm right there with ya.